Randomness

Last night I finished my dress, even though I should've left it alone until today. Because i need to fix a couple of things. The hem for one! Ick...I hate hemming without my serger. But oh wells i will fix it. But its cute. Its gray and pink. As soon as I get the hem fixed I will post pictures of me in it!. I am so excited I finished it. Its my first real project since my mom passed away. I know if she could see it she would flip! One because I am in pink lol! My mom use to put me in pink and I'd get the dress dirty on purpose lol. My mom would always scold me but I'd tell her some extravagant tale to why I was dirty. Moms you got to love them!

Work today was crazy. I had a doctors appointment this morning and was like omg I hate needles. I knew it was my lab work today so yeah I was getting stuck. I did. I also got "stuck" at work. They called and left me a voicemail stating I had to be in work at 3 adn close, when I was scheduled to get off at 6pm. Bleh! But HA to them I got out at 73o! hehe...

Well now I am home, and wondering what I will work on next! I am leaning back toward being kinda "gothic punk" on my dressing. Which is funny because I use to dress Victorian-ish with a bit darker. Now I look and that is now placed as gothic punk? I was like hmm.. Ok what ever I just know how I like to dress. My husband is ecstatic. When he met me I dressed kinda like that. But my best friend who is like 50! YES I know, but well she didn't like the way I dressed so she kinda cleaned out my closet and well now I am stuck with LOTS OF COLOR AND PREPPY CLOTHES! I am far from being a prep and actually I am very uncomfortable dressed like that. I love flowie * don't think a real word* clothes and that is how I dressed but it was more blacks, whites, creams, blues, and grays. I had other colors just not bright colors! 

I love scarves, long skirts, flowing sleeved shirts, corsets, boots *of all styles*, mary jane style shoes....so yeah...when she went through my clothes I lost all that. Oh and I forgot my bum around jeans with their many many holes in them!

Hmm I've no clue what I am gonna do tonight. I think I am gonna work on designing a couple of things. I know today when I went to the thrift store I found a couple of neat shirts. Just now the matter of putting outfits together. So I can see the things I need to buy or make :)

The days move on

As the days pass I realize more and more how lucky I am to have the life I have. I have a loving husband who treats me like a queen....sometimes I think I am his queen b***h lol. But he smiles and tells me he loves me. Of late I have been sick. I hate being sick... but perhaps if I take my medicine my stomach wouldn't be so grumpy. Classes are winding down, actually only 2 more days of real class time. I am so happy to see the spring classes to come to an end.



Tonight I think of my cat that has ran away. I pray for his return. If he comes home I will give him lots of love and TUNA! (just putting that out in the cosmos)



Spiritually I feel a change, and believe it is time for me to change and to reach back to my roots and ways of life that I have forgotten. Nothing extravagant but something a bit more down to my level. As for our home, it is slowly becoming ours again. I am looking forward to actually start sewing and gardening again. *grins* I am looking ot grow some homemade tomatoes so I can make homemade salsa when we want it.



I made some recently and used the peppers my dad gave me and well..lets say it was a HIT! So was my dad's peppers.



Lately I have wondered where I am religiously. Do I believe in GOD? Jesus? Virgin Mary?....these questions swirl in my mind like currents in and ocean. I believe in God....but-there is so much I have learned about religion and I have seen so much that man has changed. So where does God's word still be God's word. And then again I feel as though there can be more than God. For were we not taught we wre made in thier image. So does this lead us to believe there is more than one God?



Too much to truly think on tonight. My head hurts and it is late. I have a very long day ahead of me perhaps tomorrow sometime I can think some more on this subject. Until then adieu.

my week

Things have been crazy. Last monday I burned my hand at work. I ended up with a second degree burn that got infected. Well i tell ya it sucks when you get infected and get sick from it. Well work has gone to hell because of our "manager" who can't handle the pressure of being a manager. She makes people work freaking 10 h our days and they are part time. Its like um yeah. Well I haven't seen my schedule yet and won't until tomorrow. I sat at the freaking health center all day for them to tell me they double scheduled so i have to come back tuesday at 112o. So i am like fun fun. They couldn't get me in today so i am like yea.


But oh well ... i am gonna go for now. just wanted to just vent a second.

*rises from ashes*

Ok it has been forever since I have actually been on. Omg.. I think I need to dust off my laptop. I've posted a couple of voice post but not many actual typed ones. I have been an bad blogger...
So far the issue is one school has been so crazy plus part time work and all that took place last year. Losing my real mom to an issue that really bothers me. *idiot doctors*
Then this year I had great news I am now Sandy Weldon! I can't believe I actually took teh leap and got married.
My lap top is dying due to the mnay errors of late. I am like grrrr.... now my vid card is going out. SOOOOO....i have to call HP again and be like um yeah .... it didn't work so can we please replace my vid card? because i've had 4 people who work on laptops everyday go .. your video card is goin out. They can't touch it due to my warranty on my laptop... *tear*
so.....here i am finally a time to breathe and hopefully get myself back grounded. I don't knwo if anyone has ever lost themselves but i think i lost myself for a while. I am slowly realizing there is alot I am missing in life because i refuse to open my eyes and see it. I guess once we experience a pain that rips our insides out we want to just lie down and sleep in hopes when we wake it will be gone. I have done alot of thinking and realized I need to do serious soul searching. I've wanted my home to be just me and gary for sometime in hopes maybe i will mellow out. I have been so tightly wound i am unsure if i am coming or going. my life has been turned upside down with the death of my mother. everyone still talks about her. i want to talk about her but it is difficult for me. I guess it is because it is still so fresh in my heart.
maybe soon i will be able to be my happy go lucky self. I am unsure of it but i am hoping i can be :)

tired

Things are crazy... i have 18 days before my wedding and no location so I can't mail out invites!@ yeah i am not to happy.. i am tried and wanting something sweet and its like 1230 at nite... not good...

work has beenc razy mrs linda has been psycho lately so i've no clue what to do with her except tell mom omg what is wrong with her..

other day someone turns the timer off on the freaking oven and i get blamed for the cookies burning when i wasn't even there... hmm too easy yeah... well i didn't get in trouble so its like hmm wth? but oh well id o n't know...

maybe i will go make turn overs eat on one... clean up my room ... put away my laundry and then crash.. idk i has tow ork on my schedule for next week.. lovely!

tired

this week is full of things to do and need to do...ah work and school will be the death of my sanity. perhaps one day i will hold and memorial to that poor state of mind. yet are we truly sane? or are we all insane?

Days have been crazy

Things have been going quite strange. The days are counting down until my wedding. Tonite I should cut out my wedding dress and sometime tomorrow actually look for thread that will match the fabric for my dress. I wonder what I am going to for my honeymoon. I think maybe we will go down to Mexico beach and enjoy ourselves for a few days. Crap I have to go adn get my clothes out of the wash and throw them in the dryer. I have work at 3 and its like 218. SO I am off and can't wait until tonite when there is no one here but me and gary ...i miss having teh house to ourselves. It sucks having people around all the dang time.

Brethren

kindred spirit

one to smile

laugh and cry

like a star

so beautiful

bright and endless

my heart

fills greatly

with happiness

a cool fall

lightly brushes

my soul

when your hand

touches mine

chaotic yet orderly

does my mind

settling only

when you are near

overwhelming you are

my kindred spirit

yes you are

forever shall

the stars

peer upon you

with loving eyes

in loving memory of my mother,

Matilda Diane Bonnell

Mom How do I live without you?

Just about this week

Well its been a few days since I posted...Grr..i've had to work all week and my lap top is off to HP people to get fixed. So i am stuck with coming to the desk top for my p ost... BLASPHEMY!

Work has been good my stepmom i sback at work so all the lazy ppl are now forced to work hehe...I loves it!hmm sunday I was off me and gary went and had fun before he went to work..which the lunch we had made him sick so he was at home with me :) I loved it. So i chlled and played gears of war that me and him are playing.

I've beenon rock band 2 alot also. Hmm... so i also ended up crashing sunday also after giving gary many kisses before bed.

Monday....lets see i was hoping for a nite alone but no cigar...Al was home.. BUMMEr I miss days when i could come home and NO ONE be here. Sigh one day it will just be our place again. lol

Tuesday....went grocery shopping after work. I got liz to go with me so I wouldn't be alone. She was asleep oops i woke her up :) We had chicken brocoli alfredo and wine. Yellow Tail Merlot is a good wine. Strong but a good wine.

Wednesday...well I got paid and was froggy so I came home and got my sister to get her but dressed and off we went. To the mall...I bought these awesome boots from HOT TOPIC..omg they were cute. Soft leather with the lace up the outter side. I've been drooling for months over these boots so I finally said **** it and I got them. So after The mall and the rather serious scare I had of loosing my phone. Thank god someone at the service desk had it. I was like great now i will have to take my boots back just so I can get a new phone! CRAP>..but i lucked out it was at the service desk.

We then decided to go to Las Bandaras to eat. Well......this was Hilarious because our waiter seemed to be infatuated with me. He could not understnad I had a boyfriend and wasn't leaving him anytime soon! THen he was like you know spanish. I was like very little------>big mistake...i should have said no....god...dude was on me crazy....finally he takes our order and leaves. He comes back and continues to flirt. I am like omg go away but instead I smile and am like thank you. At the end of the nite he is like you want a to go box we are like yes please. Then he asked me do you want to take me home? I was like um no you would so get me in trouble!

After there we went home and changed our shirts (we were in our corset style shirts from HOt TOpic we decided to wear them bc we hardly wear them when we go out) off to books amillion we go. I fill in my lovely moleskin i got in the mail and we have coffee and chill.

Ah and for yesterday..me and my step mom jo went out. I took her out for her birthday. We meet at the mall. We had our nails done and she was so tickled I showed her the place. Its 10 bucks more there but the nails it self are better because of the fact the white tip isn't painted on :) she loved that. So after Our nails we were like FOOD so I showed her another new place to her....the little buffet place in the mall... *brain fart* I so can't remember the name...grr... but its a chinese place. We ate and was like omg good@ she wants to take my dad there one nite. I think he will love it ;)

Then we decide after food we need a hair cut...her a cut me a trim. They had remodeled master cuts (i get my hair cut here all the time) plus there was a new staff added...a guy named Warren cut our hair. He was very serious about our hair..he washed it and then cut it. I never get my hair washed lol... curly hair and it is picky! but he so got my hair back kinky again! Wee... he pretty much man handled my hair but omg it looked great! So here we walked in feeling bleh and walked out feeling like new women!

Ah lets see...oh yeah I got gary out of bed...after I read my mail from my friend Maiju...short letter but worth reading :) It was nice to get a letter from her. I have to finish my letter to Kristy :) then I need to send my friend Jacinta a letter :) I loves my friends who are all around ;) Getting mail is so awesome when its from someone new and from a different niche in the world !

Ah after kicking gary out of bed we got ready to go out (i is almost broke lol) Liz had some friends over so we chilled a bit before going to CJ's pub and pool and shooting a couple of games of pool...and oh Gary so lost his shirt ot me in pool...i won 4 out of 6 games :)

Hehe he is grumpy now..i took his pc to do my journal post lol hehe....oh well...oops on the 360 he goes POUTS we were suppose to go out today.... grrr... boys!Well I guess I will go I am hungry and wants food so I think i will get in my kitchen and create a new dish or somethign random!TTFN

Reflections of 2008

I know perhaps I should have done this earlier but work did not permit that. SO lets see... my year of 2008...

Hmm, we lived with Gary's dad in January which lasted until March... we had moved in prior to that in 2007. Things were good, I left my job to help his dad which I found to be a complete disaster on my part.

We moved to Valdosta at our current house....We've been here since May.

Things money wise has gone up adn down. Sometimes so badly it frightened me.

I managed to keep us a float. Which was good. Me and Gary almost split up this year...we had a very bad fight. We found out though that we are happy together and no matter what we fight over its not worth losing what we've got.

Which brings us to the happy news of my 2008, which was Gary proposed to me in February.

Unfortunately just as my year was growing better, it was darkened greatly. My Mother, Matilda, grew very ill. She had a stroke the day after my birthday in October. She soon grew worse and I had to make the most awfullest decisions a child should ever have to make. My mother died the week before her birthday/Thanksgiving Day. So now my heart is still very hurt ....tonite me and my sister were talking of my mom.... I miss her and so does my sister...what happens when you lose your best friend and mother?

My step mom and my dad they have finally came back to me..due to my divorce to my retarded ex...he turned my family against me. Now they have realized how stupid he was almost 5 years later....*grumbles*

I managed to get back in school this year and start on masters in education. so that is a positve thing... I ended this last semester with 3 B's and 1 A :) I hope to do even better next semester which starts teh 14th of this month.

My poor car is still running...which is an amazing thing... *grins* one day I will get everything fixed on it lol...it needs new headlights, speedometer, new tires, wind shield wipers.....so yeah that is just the tip of the ice burg...

Hmmm.....lets see..ah yes I have a job....Its not much but it is a job. I work at a deli in a super market here in Valdosta. My boss is my step mom which isn't a bad thing.

I've read many books....but during school its mainly text books lol...

Hmmm... i really can't think of any thing else to place...this is the abridged version lol

I am the empress of evil(december 31st post)

OMG I have been so bleh lately. My laptop went on the fritz, so I've been trying to get it up and going. I've not posted about my Holidays yet. So lets see, Christmas day was very good. I loved my gifts I got! My mum and dad got me a picture box to store my pics in and a lock box to lock up money when i need. Hmmm but isn't that what a bank account is for? And she got me some awesome stationary! it is beige and red with a red dress on the edge...i love it the dress looks like something I would wear. *squees*

I got some awesome stationary from friends and some really cool buttons! My switch gifter at work gave me a cheese cutter set and a pretty necklace set from Avon. BUt it was nice.

I have been sick this past week still don't feel so up in the weather. I am seriously not wanting to go to work tomorrow. I slept in way late today and well its seriously messed up my sleeping schedule.

Work has been ok, my step mum is on vacation so the lazy people don't really want to work. Which pisses me off because when i am there, I am the one who all the work is thrown on. *grumbles*

Things have been odd because I seem to be off railed. I make messes left and right. . . . I don't know what is wrong with me lately. I seem off I don't know.

I know I will be glad when I am back on track.

Tonight I wanted to talk to my friend Matt. But I don't knwo why? Perhaps in a sense I am missing talking to him more than I thought I would.

I have also set today on my day off and watch tv all day. Silly I know but hey....it is something to do that requires no thought.

I got into watching the Secret diary of a Call girl......8 episodes 24 mins a piece. Interesting show.....then it made me think that boy I need to work out more..... damn you Billie Piper....and you're flat tummy and nice ass *cries*

Well I need sleep and a hot shower before work at oh...lets say 10am and its like oh....3 am now...god i need sleep.....

oh the line up in the subject...hehe guess where that came from? Its a movie.... :grins: one that I love to watch adn laugh at.